I’m playing French music with my aunt (who’s half French) and my uncle, who’s drunk. He keeps bickering at her, “Why can’t you talk to me like that? Can you speak French? You know your aunt’s half French right? Angéliqueeeeeee, je t’aime, parlez français à moi, I love you, I love you so much. Rashad, you know no matter what she does, I’ll still still love her, she’s my baby, she’s my sweetheart.”
I just had an extremely unrealistic dream about genetic recombination, and it irked me so much that I woke myself up.
That terribly confusing moment when autocorrect leads your best friend to believe that you have a pet duck which you’d like them to suck on, angrily.